


Our Love Was Made For Movie Screens

by King_Cymbelline



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Angst, Breakups, Carolina Hurricanes, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nashville Predators, No Ending, Not Beta Read, Panic Attacks, Rare Pairings, Technically Incomplete, breakup over the phone, did not go into a lot of detail about said panic attack, just go with it, sad juuse, singular panic attack however
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-04-21
Packaged: 2018-10-22 02:19:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10687755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/King_Cymbelline/pseuds/King_Cymbelline
Summary: “I love you,” Teuvo says softly, his whole body shaking as he holds onto those three words for some sort of comfort.Juuse has to stop himself from standing up and punching the wall. He bites his tongue in anger, shakes his head, tears still dripping from his chin.“If you love me,” Juuse breathes in, so close to sobbing and completely breaking down. “Why are you leaving me?”





	Our Love Was Made For Movie Screens

**Author's Note:**

> Just another idea I needed to write down before I lost it. Technically incomplete, the ending is at an awkward spot. 
> 
> The more I think about this, the more I start to think of things I dislike about it, so hopefully, posting it will get that all out of my system.

It’s nearly eight in the evening when Juuse gets the call. He takes a deep breath and answers it, trying to hide the nerves in his voice. He’s trembling. 

It’s Teuvo, he can tell by the number. He had deleted his contact after a recent fight they had, but Juuse was still somewhat happy and hopeful when he answered the phone.

“Hello,” Juuse sighs, slightly smiling to himself. He’s assuming Teuvo has called to make up, tell him how much he misses him and that he’s flying out to see him as they speak. 

It’s not the case.

“Juuse,” Teuvo starts, taking a minute to compose himself. Juuse is oblivious to what Teuvo is running through his mind, his own hands shaking as he grips the phone tightly on the opposite line. “I have to tell you something,” Teuvo’s close to tears and he doesn’t think he can tell him. 

“Over the phone? What a coward,” Teuvo thinks to himself, pity pooling in the bottom of his stomach. 

“O-okay,” Juuse replies, his heart dropping. He can sense there’s something wrong. He sits down on his bed, fumbling with the bottom of his shirt as his chest starts to rise and fall quickly.

“It’s just not right anymore,” Teuvo explains, his breath hitching in his throat, and he has to swallow his regret before he speaks again. “It was nice for the summer but…” He trails, gripping the side of the couch tight as he loses all of his courage, all of the words he had planned to say, his rehearsal of how to break Juuse’s heart.

“But what?” Juuse pleads, tears already falling from his face. “Was it what happened the other night? Teuvo, I said I’m sorry, we can-”

“No,” Teuvo is quick to cut in, sharp even, his voice makes Juuse jump. “No, Juuse, it’s not that.” 

“Then what?” Juuse begs for an answer but all he receives is a broken sigh from Teuvo as he pinches the bridge of his nose. 

Juuse’s mind wanders a bit, back to the seasonal love between Teuvo and him. The nights they spent together, sleepless nights, lovely nights. Juuse didn’t want to throw it all away. 

“Just not now,” Teuvo says suddenly, it’s him thinking out loud. “The time isn’t right.”

“Oh,” Juuse whispers, still not understanding but not wanting to push Teuvo. He didn’t want a reason when he thought about it. “Are you seeing someone else?” He blurts, catching himself off guard. He immediately regrets it, learning Teuvo loves someone else is the last thing he wants to hear.

“No,” Teuvo tells him honestly. “Juuse, it’s nothing against you, it has nothing to do with anybody else, it’s just me.”

Juuse scoffs at how cliche that sounds, but he doesn’t aggravate Teuvo, not now. Making jokes is not the path he wants to take, he just wants this over with. 

“I’m sorry,” Teuvo whispers, he’s the one crying now. “I’m sorry, Juuse.”

Juuse isn’t sure how to respond. Normally, he’d smile, play it off, tell Teuvo, “It’s okay,”. But it’s not okay. Juuse is heartbroken, confused, and he feels abandoned. 

“I love you,” Teuvo says softly, his whole body shaking as he holds onto those three words for some sort of comfort. 

Juuse has to stop himself from standing up and punching the wall. He bites his tongue in anger, shakes his head, tears still dripping from his chin. 

“If you love me,” Juuse breathes in, so close to sobbing and completely breaking down. “Why are you leaving me?”

“I-” Teuvo chokes on his words, left slightly in shock.

“I gotta go,” Juuse sighs, barely even able to think straight. He feels numb at this point, not even registering what Teuvo said when he began to hang up the phone. 

He chucks it against the wall, not caring about the screen or any of the furniture nearby. He’s fuming, he wants to run to wherever Teuvo is and just scream at him. 

He buries his head in his hands, gripping his hair tight and groaning loudly. He wants to rip his hair out, set something on ablaze, scream at the top of his lungs. 

He already feels like he’s on fire, however. Everything is burning, his heart, his lungs, his head, his eyes. He needs something to put it out. 

Pekka.

Juuse stumbles out of his room and heads towards the lounge, Pekka is always there reading before bed. 

He’s stopped in the doorway, not knowing how to say what had just happened. 

“I told you not to dwell on practice,” Pekka says after he takes a glance at the slumped over Juuse in front of him. He returns to his book without looking back up until Juuse sniffles. 

“He left,” He says brokenly, eyes glued to a spot on the carpet. He looks up with Pekka with tired, red eyes, having no idea what to do next, he hadn’t thought this far.

It takes Pekka a moment to respond. Seconds later, he slams his book shut and basically throws it to the side-table, not concerned about any damage. He uncrosses his legs and motions for Juuse to come closer to him. 

Juuse wastes no time hurrying to the couch and nearly throwing himself on top of Pekka, hiding his face in Pekka’s shirt and holding onto whatever he can ball up in his fists.

Juuse is sobbing now, letting all of his emotions go as Pekka wraps him up in his arms, Pekka silently swearing that the next time he sees Teuvo, he’s gonna have some words to say to him.

“He said he loved me,” Juuse explains between cries. “He said that Pek, but if he did why the fuck did he leave?” 

Pekka rubs Juuse’s arm, an attempt to get him to calm down, but he knew it was no use. “I’m sorry,” He whispers. 

Juuse feels his chest tighten and he has to fight for his breath as he falls into a coughing fit, Pekka still rubbing his arm. 

Minutes later, Juuse falls asleep.

******

Juuse ends up going to sleep alone, in his own bed. He doesn’t want to entirely lean on Pekka for support, he wants to try and deal with this on his own.

But the second he crawls into bed, the feeling of loneliness and emptiness takes over and he suddenly feels incredibly isolated.

He wraps his arms around himself, trying to make up for the lack of warmth and comfort in the room. He’s then haunted by more memories he and Teuvo shared, the love they exchanged for so many nights, the random conversations they would have at two in the morning.

He almost didn’t want to go to sleep, for he would have to wake up and face the fact Teuvo’s gone. Either sleep forever or never at all. 

“Too dark,” Juuse grimaces at his own thoughts, rolls over, tries again.

It takes about an hour for him to finally doze off, pillow damp from tears and eyes raw from rubbing. There’s a dark blue line forming on the edge of his nose due to a number of times he’s wiped his nose on his sleeve or hand. His hairs a rat’s nest, his lip is swollen from the chewing he’s done– he’s just a mess. 

He wakes up a few hours later, head pounding from his latest dream, Teuvo burned into the back of his mind, even showing up behind his eyelids when he blinks. 

“Enough!” Juuse screams, sitting up and hiding his head in his hands once more. He’s sobbing uncontrollably, asking the dark what he’s done wrong. “I want to fix it!” He shouts to nothing. He doesn’t know which is more agitating, the fact he cannot fix this, or the fact he cannot get an answer from his darkened bedroom.

He brings his legs up to his chest, feels himself begin to lose control over his breathing. His hands are running up and down his face and his head like he’s trying to keep everything in place. He’s panicking. "What did I do?"

Moments later, Pekka bursts in the room, rushing to the side of the bed and pulling Juuse into his arms again, soothing him by whispering words of comfort and fixing his hair. 

“What did I do?” Juuse asks Pekka. 

“Nothing,” He replies, shaking his head. “He’s just not good for you right now.”

The words are bitter on Pekka’s tongue and Juuse knows it. It scares Juuse– the way Pekka can sound so aggressive in one sentence. Right now, however, Juuse doesn’t care.

“I love him, Pekka.” Juuse cries softly. “He said he loved me too, why– how could h-he do this? What did I do to change his mind? I th-thought we were fine,” He’s blabbering, trying to find some sort of logical explanation as to why his heart was broken. 

“I don’t know, Juuse, I don’t know,” Pekka tells him, trying to get him to calm down. “You’re gonna be okay, though, with or without him.”

It takes Juuse a while to calm down, to catch his breath and stop shaking as much. His hands are holding onto Pekka as if he’s going to up and leave him.

Like Teuvo.

“All I want is-” Juuse takes a deep breath, trying his best to not break down again. “-To find somebody like him again.”

Pekka nods, he understands the relationship the two of them had, but not even he could wrap his head around why Teuvo had left. He wants someone like Teuvo for Juuse, but he also wants someone different, someone that won't hurt him. He really just wants someone to treat Juuse right. 

And Juuse really just wants Teuvo back.


End file.
